Make: A Master's Degree & Wine Corks (12/2)

December 2nd

Make: This is a two pronged prompt! What did you enjoy making this year? Did you “make the Dean’s list”? Or, maybe you made a really good wine, or maybe you made some furniture? And, what do you look forward to making during the holidays? Cookies?  Homemade gifts? 

In 2011

At the end of April, or at the beginning of May, I finished my last final for the last class of my graduate program. I can say, looking back, that I thoroughly enjoyed “making” my degree. After all, learning is a key part of staying alive. 

Deciding to go to graduate school in 2009 was a decision crafted by the downward spiral of the economy.

My profession and my skills felt as though they were headed to the grave. The Internet takes much away from broadcast and the monotony of my daily tasks left me craving creativity. Fortunately, the program I enrolled in allowed me much of that.

For the Holidays

Last year I blogged about looking forward to making something with wine corks. I now have enough wine corks to make a Christmas tree, place settings, and I could definitely contribute to making a wine cork chair. My friends at ONEHOPE Wine will understand where that came from. (Yes, finishing my Master's Degree has something to do with all the wine corks.)

And, speaking of wine, I was a part of a winemaking group at the end of 2010 and we bottled the wine in April. It’s supposed to be ready for the palate by Christmas. That’s something that I am looking forward to trying before the year is even over. Therefore, I suppose my answers could be the same. 

How about you? Did you make anything this year? What do you think about the value of education? 

Memory: An Empty Airplane Seat (12/1)

Earlier this week after learning that a blogging community I participated in last year would not continue, but would rather be a self-initiated event I decided to create Resonating Reflections. Last year, the group #Reverb10 built a community around one another and those who participated learned a lot about themselves, each other, and found support that otherwise may not have been there. Upon the suggestion that we each create our own #Reverb11, I settled upon the concept of #Resonate11. In essence, it's the same thing. I just used a different "name." So, whether you are in a #Reverb11 group, or joining this one, we're in this together. Thanks to the team that brought us here to begin with.

December 1st

Memory: What’s the first thing you remember about 2011? What stands out in your head? Grab a piece of paper and write down the first five things or moments that come to your mind. Then, write about them. Choose one that you remember the most. Why? Or, use your camera. Take a picture. Maybe you captured that moment you remember.

1. Hawaii- Particularly an empty seat on an airplane
2. Pretzel M&M’s in Nashville 
3. A fun night with a friend with whom I hadn't spent much time with
4. Watching Sara Evans sing “Stronger” on TV for the first time
5. Being dumfounded and surprised

That’s my list. They didn’t come to me so quickly, did they come quickly for you? 

For anyone who has followed the journey thus far on the blog, they likely know why the song “Stronger” resonates with me so deeply. Yet it’s nearly been one year since I had to become stronger.

An Empty Plane Seat Next to Me
January 12, 2011

The first moment is the best moment that set me up for the whole year. I got on a plane to go to Hawaii, a trip I was supposed to take with someone else. Somewhere over the Pacific Ocean I realized why the seat was empty. I don’t know why it took me so long, I had only been single for a month. With the holidays in-between the four weeks felt like a mixture of four minutes and four years: a blur. 

As soon I figured it out, I took a picture. Then I asked the flight attendant for a glass of champagne. 

Join the Journey. Answer the Prompts & Tweet Your Link using #resonate11

Putting the Puzzle Pieces of Life Together

In five days it will be one year since I started this blog process. It started out as one kind of journey, and as life changed, it has become another. 

Writing often helps one put the
puzzle pieces of life together.

The other night, while on an airplane traveling to a getaway I wrote a poem. Writing, for me, has always been an idiosyncratic process. It just happens. When I write what reads like a poem or song lyrics to me the words flow in one stream of consciousness. Once, I wrote a two page poem, front and back, while in between classes in college. I had about seven minutes to do it.

Sometimes, with writing, the words just come because the story is already in the author. 

At the top of the page on yellow legal pad paper I wrote, “Written just shy of 11 months from the day since my life changed (not that anyone is counting).” I wanted to put some finality on the shock that comes when a relationship ends; or rather, when my relationship ended. 

If you remember, I started this blog because my boyfriend at the time would call me things that hurt my feelings. The ending of the relationship though, when that happened, it hurt more. Then, there were a lot of other feelings that came out over the course of time. Removed, I finally had a way to address what it felt like in that instant that everything changed. 

Who knows, maybe this will help you or someone you know deal with the pain, heartache, grief, or whatever it is. 

I don't know what you just said.

I'm sorry, I missed it.

Tell me one more time that everything

is not alright.

Cuz I can't think.

I'm lost inside.

I can't find - 

Where am I supposed to go?

You said goodbye, I know

That part I got right.

I'm sorry, but I don't know why?

Tell me one more time that everything

is not alright.

Cuz I can't hear you.

I'm not listening.

I can't find - 

Where am I supposed to go?

You're gone, You're gone.

I'm all alone, all alone.

Just get up and say goodbye. 

It's not for me to leave.

I'm sorry, you've got to go.

I don't know what you just said.

I'm sorry, I missed it.

But that don't matter now -

You're gone, alright, and out of my life.

and now I'm free

Thank God you had to leave.

I am free.

Now that I'm who I'm supposed to be.

And I am fine.

Everything is alright. 

How do you deal with loss? With heartache? What’s your method of dealing with what you know to be good (like the ending of a relationship that should have ended) and also with the sadness that it ended anyway? Do you allow yourself to realize that it’s alright and natural to feel both relief and sadness at the same time? Let me know what you think. If you want... 

Photo Courtesy:  http://uwbwritingcenter.wordpress.com/2010/10/18/confession-i-write-poetry/

If I Die Young... (Part 1)

Kimberly Perry is somewhat in a state of contentment. The song she wrote, that her band (The Band Perry) sings and has won awards for is all about knowing all is well.

con·tent·ment/kənˈtentmənt/

Noun:

A state of happiness and satisfaction.

Synonyms:

satisfaction - gratification - complacency - complacence

Just in case you were wondering.

In my last post I wrote about writing something down, making it happen, writing it into life. Writing, for me, is a way of putting something out into the world. Then, let whatever the world wants to do with it - have at it. Right?

“If I die young...” It’s a contemplative phrase. 

Life is short, so my question is what can each one of us do to ensure that however short, or long, our lives are that we can say the following:

“I’ve had just enough time.”

This isn’t a message about giving up. This is a message about living on without any hurried pursuit of anything. Just be you, the great you that you were meant to be. 

If you’re thinking about suicide, there is help:

In the U.S., call 1-800-273-8255

National Suicide Prevention Lifeline